Even though I'm almost 60, just started taking hair supplements and swear by this time released melatonin, I still feel an edgy rebellion when I look at this picture.
There's a sultry, mysterious, badassery about her. What's she looking at? Where's she going? Who's broken that tender heart beneath her breezy blouse and who's tread lightly on it?
I was raised Methodist and good girls don't say bad words, steal kisses without the sanctity of marriage or, God literally forbid, ever let a man feel he is less than.
Back in the day (girl, think waaay back), there was a book and course called Fascinating Girl that touted itself as a "step by step guide on how to gain the attention and interest of men.
It was the only training I had on learning "the art of attracting men".
"Rid yourself of any tendency to think about yourself...train yourself to forget about yourself."
It was this training and these words that began a decades long betrayal of my dark feminine energy. I buried this energy in my youth like so many of my purity culture sisters.
But now, decades later, as the patriarchy bears down on us, creating chaos and confusion, it's time for a feminine rebalancing. And that means learning to revel in your dark feminine energy.
Even today as I write this, I feel like I still need to be devoted to it's burial and not it's resurrection.
What is Dark Feminine Energy and Should You Embrace It?
Unlike "light feminine energy," (the one we're most familiar with) which is associated with nurturing, creativity, intuition and gentleness.
Dark feminine energy is about personal power, independence, and the unwillingness to hide your true self for the comfort of society.
Dark feminine energy isn't about evil or negativity, even though the term "dark" might mislead you. Rather, it's a term used to describe the raw, unfiltered, hidden side of femininity.
It's the femme fatale, the powerful seductress, and the woman who's brave enough to own shadow self.
Dark feminine energy what allows you to bring the light feminine energy into balance by helping you:
- Set strong boundaries
- Go after what you want unapologetically
- Embrace your sexuality
- Speak your truth, even if it's uncomfortable
- Connect with your intuition and inner wisdom
How Do You Know If You Embody Dark Feminine Energy?
As a girl raised in the Methodist church, I knew the dark feminine energy was frowned on even before I knew what it was.
I was rebellious, had strong opinions and intense emotions.
I'm an Enneagram 4 and an INFJ, so I naturally have intense emotions, but I never remember a time in my youth when those qualities were encouraged. I mostly felt ashamed when they were exposed.
12 Characteristics of Dark Feminine Energy
- Intense emotions: Embrace the full spectrum of your feelings.
- Independence: Value your autonomy and don't seek validation from others.
- Magnetism: Own your charisma and allure.
- Rebellious spirit: Challenge societal norms and expectations.
- Intuition: Trust your gut feelings and inner wisdom.
- Sexuality: Embrace your sensuality and sexual power.
- Mystery: Cultivate an air of intrigue and enigma.
- Boundaries: Set clear limits and protect your energy.
- Self-expression: Don't be afraid to express your true self, even if it's unconventional.
- Transformation: Embrace change and growth as part of your journey.
- Shadow work: Explore and integrate your shadow self.
- Power: Own your personal power and use it to create the life you desire.
